Ask Judy: When Will My Baby Sleep Through The Night?

Dear Judy: Well, I know that every baby is different and all will finally sleep through the night whenever they’re ready, but at 6 months, my daughter is still not sleeping through the night (she did it 3 times over the course of last month, then it stopped). Various people have told me that this is because she’s not learning how to put herself back to sleep because I breastfeed her everytime she wakes up. They’ve told me that she’s conditioning herself to need the breast to get to sleep. She’s always been a big comfort nurser, it’s how I get her to bed every night, and honestly, it seems like they’re right — she won’t go back to sleep unless she breastfeeds (pacifiers, bottles of breastmilk, rocking, etc. don’t really work). She doesn’t eat much at these feedings, and they’re occurring every 3-4 hours, so I don’t think it’s a hunger issue.
I don’t want to give up opportunities to breastfeed her because I work full time and one lunch feeding plus evening/night feedings are what I have left, but if I’m creating a child that won’t sleep, that’s not good either.
It’s a big worry because she doesn’t sleep much at all during the day (seriously, this child will NOT nap), so I want to maximize the sleep she’s getting at night. Thanks, Krista

Hi Krista, Sleep is probably the “issue” with the most divergent opinions when it comes to babies. The truth is – every baby is different and every baby has different needs. Many breastfed babies wake frequently at night. You have to remember that your baby’s belly is only as large as her little fist - so even though she is six months old, she may need to eat during the night to help her get back to sleep. You might want to try waking her up a bit when she wakes up so that she gets a bigger feed and then put her back down. If she gets more in, she may stay asleep longer than if she just takes a nibble and falls back to sleep. There is a great article on babies and sleeping which you can read here.

Also, keep in mind that when doctors talk about “sleeping through the night” they mean that your baby goes for 5 hours without waking. Sleeping through the night does not mean sleeping all night long! Your baby may be “sleeping through the night” more often than you realize.

Have you considered co-sleeping? My son started sleeping through the night at age 4 weeks (yes I was VERY lucky!). When he was 4 months old, I went back to work and within 2 days of returning to work, my son started waking during the night to feed. You mentioned that you also work – so your daughter may be waking up to spend time with you. Once I started working again, my son was up all night nursing. He didn’t eat very much during the day with his caregiver and did the majority of his nursing at night. To get some sleep myself, I started co-sleeping with my son. He would go down in his own bed at 8 PM and then when he woke up at 1 AM or so, I would bring him into my bed. He would then nurse whenever he wanted and we would both get much more sleep! My husband used to tell me that he would wake up during the night – my son would be nursing away and I would be sound asleep. This worked until he was about 11 or 12 months old and he got too squirmy to sleep with – then I transitioned him back to his own bed.

You may want to try co-sleeping. You can read a great article about it here.

I’m sorry that I don’t have anything “concrete” to help you – but all I can say is YOU KNOW YOUR BABY better than anyone else – if you think this is what she needs, then it probably is. Don’t worry what others are telling you – do what is right for you and your baby.

Did you have sleep issues with your baby? How did you overcome them? Please leave a comment with any tips or tricks that worked for you!

Infants And Adjusting To The New Time

This past weekend we moved our clocks back one hour for daylight savings time. Changing the time of day can be difficult on all of us (it can be just like jet lag!), but it can be especially difficult on young children and infants. They are running on their body’s clock – not the artificial one hanging on the wall. So the time it gets dark and the numbers on the clock often don’t help them in adjusting their schedules to the new time zone.

To help your baby or toddler adjust, we recommend doing the adjustment gradually. Put your little one to bed at their regular bed time, then the next night adjust it by 15 minutes. Give them a few days to get used to the new time and then adjust it by another 15 minutes. It might take you several days or even weeks to adjust their schedule by the full one hour, but you will be so happy that you did – and so will your baby!

If you have school-aged children, you might even want to adjust their bedtime to be one-hour earlier than normal – that way they will be getting lots of rest and it will make getting up in time for the bus much easier!

Do you have any other tips for helping your little ones adjust to the new time zone? Please share your tips and tricks with other moms by leaving a comment below.

Ask Judy: How Do I Help My Baby Sleep?

Dear Judy, I have a question regarding sleep. Ok, my daughter is six months old and is now on solids. We are up to breakfast and lunch with the oatmeal cereal. I still breastfeed her 7 times a day. We have been going through sleep training for a one week and 2 days. I have noticed at the beginning of the night she wakes from a dead sleep whinning and flopping around. It is always between 8:43 and 8:56 pm. She is going down around 8 pm. Based on my charting of her sleeping patterns she does better going to sleep between 8 and 8:15 pm. At first it took her 40 mins to return to sleep on her own. Now it about 8 mins.

Regarding the swaddling, she took herself out over a week ago. I would swaddle her and she would get out and sleep fine. So, I put her in a sleep sack now. Her day time sleep has improved greatly. She is able to deal with the startle responses while asleep. For some reason at night now she wakes between 8:43 and 8:56 PM . Its been about a week of her spontaneous waking. If I go in to pat at night, and shush her, it actually agitates her. I can do it during the day, which is interesting. At night, she does go back to sleep its just that the during the time she is up is anxiety provoking for me. Her poor little cheeks have rug-rash and she has rubbed out her hair in different places trying to get back to sleep.

My concern is the abrupt waking as well as flopping around. I know she’s not hungry because I feed her right before bed. Could it be gas from the solids? I am baffled and want to help her find another way to go back to sleep as oppose to flopping everywhere.

If your daughter isn’t having solids past lunch, it is unlikely to be gas caused by the solids as that would happen closer to when she ate and you would notice her discomfort during the day as well. It may just be her sleep pattern and she needs to slowly work her way out of it. It is probably a phase that she will out-grow. Many babies will respond positively to someone going in to their room and rubbing their back or shssing her and then letting her fall back to sleep. It doesn’t sound like this will work for your baby, however. You mentioned she was flopping around – she may be going through that difficult time between swaddling and not swaddling. My son did this – he couldn’t sleep without being swaddled, but didn’t want to be swaddled – it was a two month adjustment period for him to get his sleep patterns straightened out again.

I would say give her some time. She is adjusting to being in the sleep sack vs being swaddled. You may want to swaddle her at night – even if she gets out of it, that’s OK – but it might help her get through this “difficult time” better. Don’t worry about her moving about – she will do a lot more of that as she gets older. I used to worry because my son would turn over onto his belly to sleep, but once they are able to turn, they can pretty much sleep whichever way they want and it is OK. Give it some time and see how she does. Just keep in mind – “this too shall pass.” — Judy

Update:

Dear Judy, I just wanted to give you a wonderful update. I took your advice and swaddled my daughter again and she is sleeping better. The first night I forgot, so she woke up I swaddled her and she slept longer. Our schedule was a bit off the next day, but she bounced right back. I also discovered that I made the cereal too think for her. The proof was in the poo. So, I adjusted that and she is able to pass gas easier if there is a such thing. Her poo has slowed down as well, which tells me she is adjusting. So, as usual thank you so much. I’ve learned through this introduction of solids process that breastfeeding her before her cereal works great. I feel better about her on solids knowing she is getting enough milk which means the continuation of a good supply (yay!).

Did your little one have sleep issues? What techniques worked best for you? How long did you swaddle your baby? Leave us a comment to let us know!