Summer Tips For The New Nursing Mom

As a new mom you have a lot on your plate, especially dealing with being new to breastfeeding on top of being a new mom.  Sometimes you may forget that you are still using your body to give to your child, just as you did when you were pregnant.

Here are some tips on taking care of you during the summer [yes, it is just around the corner!].  It is important to stay well hydrated, as well as keeping yourself from getting overheated.

• Drink more water.  Caffeine and alcohol can dehydrate you
• Eat more fruits and vegetables, especially those high in water content
• Wear natural fibers that breathe easily
• Relax in a bathtub while nursing for some cooling off and relaxing time
• Don’t over do it
• Run errands and do outdoor activities early in the day or in the evening
• Keep a cup of ice chips near you during the day

Please feel free to share any of your own tips for helping a new mom through a summer of breastfeeding.

Happy First Day Of Spring!!

It’s OKAY To Cry – You Just Had A Baby!

Recently a new mom that I follow on Twitter was sharing her feelings of desperation. Now keep in mind her baby is just 3 days old and it was her first night home from the hospital. Of course she was tired, scared, emotional, teary eyed, etc – She JUST had a baby!

All to often we, as mothers, put so much pressure on ourselves to be perfect. Have the perfectly cleaned home, dinner on the table by 5pm every night, laundry put away, kids cleaned and well entertained, and so much more that we miss the bigger picture. It is OKAY to cry and melt down every once and a while. We are human.

I wanted to share a little of what I told her and would love for you to share your thoughts and feelings about your first week home from the hospital.

Don’t feel guilty about others helping you out – you just had a baby. Your hormones are raging and you need rest, liquids and love. Accept the love and don’t feel guilty. Let your husband help with your son!

Take care of yourself! You just went through child birth – you need to rest and recover. A few weeks of you being less involved with your eldest son won’t hurt him. He loves you and knows you are there for him and once you recover, you will be able to be there for him more. But if you don’t take care of yourself now, it will only make it harder as time goes on and you will end up with longer periods of time before you can spend adequate time with him.

Don’t worry that your baby isn’t getting enough breastmilk. Even though you are sore, she is getting milk. It can be difficult to tell if she is having wet diapers because babies only urinate a small amount in the early days. Put a small square of toilet paper inside of her diaper so that you can tell when she has wet. As long as she is having 4-5 wet diapers per day, then she is getting plenty of your milk. Try to keep in mind that her wet diaper is not going to be huge and heavy like your son’s. It will barely have any weight to it. As long as that piece of tissue is damp, then there are no worries!

All too often new moms try to do it all. It’s hard to stop and ask for help. When help is offered we also too often just respond with “I’m fine,” as it’s easier then saying what really going on in your head – “Lord, Help me. I’m going nuts. I’m a complete basket case and all I want is a SHOWER and just one hour of peace and quiet!!” So take a moment to step back and just breath. Accept help when it is offered and make sure you talk to someone to let them know how you are feeling.

Why Short Cat-Naps Are Not Good Enough

If your child’s naps are shorter than an hour and a half in length, you may have wondered if these brief naps provide enough rest for your little one. You might suspect that these catnaps aren’t meeting your child’s sleep needs – and you would be right. The science of sleep explains why a short nap takes the edge off, but doesn’t offer the same physical and mental nourishment that a longer nap provides.

It takes between 90 and 120 minutes for your child to move through one entire sleep cycle, resulting in a Perfect Nap. It has been discovered that each stage of sleep brings a different benefit to the sleeper. Imagine, if you will, magic gifts that are awarded at each new stage of sleep:

Stage 1 – Very light sleep

Lasts 5 to 15 minutes

The gifts:

Prepares body for sleep

Reduces feelings of sleepiness

Stage 2 – Light to moderate sleep

Lasts up 15 minutes

The gifts:

Increases alertness

Improves motor skills

Stabilizes mood

Slightly reduces homeostatic sleep pressure
(The biological process that creates fatigue and irritability.)

Stage 3 – Deep sleep

Lasts up to 15 minutes

The gifts:

Strengthens memory

Release of growth hormone

Repair of bones, tissues and muscles

Fortification of immune system

Regulates appetite

Releases bottled up stress

Restores energy

Reduces homeostatic sleep pressure

Stage 4 – Deepest sleep

Lasts up to 15 minutes

The gifts:

Same benefits as Stage 3, but enhanced

Next Stage – Dreaming

Lasts up to 9 to 30 minutes

The gifts:

Transfers short-term memory into long-term memory

Organizes thoughts

Secures new learning

Enhances brain connections

Sharpens visual and perceptual skills

Processes emotions

Relieves stress

Inspires creativity

Boosts energy

Reduces homeostatic sleep pressure

Longer naps

For as long as your child sleeps

The gifts:

Repeat all of the above stages in cycles

In order for your child to receive all of these wonderful gifts he must sleep long enough to pass at least once through each stage of sleep. Longer naps will encompass additional sleep cycles and provide a continuous presentation of gifts.

Newborn babies have unique cycles that slowly mature over time. A newborn sleep cycle is about 40 to 60 minutes long, and an infant enters dream sleep quickly, skipping several sleep stages. Infants need several sleep cycles to receive their full allotment of gifts. If your infant is sleeping only 40-60 minutes at naptime it is an indication that your baby is waking between cycles instead of returning to sleep on his own. We’ll cover a plethora of ideas to help your baby learn to go back to sleep without your intervention.

Now you can clearly see why a short nap doesn’t provide your baby or young child the best benefits of napping. You can also see why a mini-nap can fool you into thinking it is enough – since the very first five to fifteen minutes reduce feelings of sleepiness and bring that whoosh of second-wind energy that dissipates quickly, resulting is fussiness, crying, crankiness, tantrums and whining.

This is a copyrighted excerpt from The No-Cry Nap Solution: Guaranteed Gentle Ways to Solve All Your Naptime Problems by Elizabeth Pantley. (McGraw-Hill, December 2008).

Elizabeth Pantley is a mother, author, and parenting educator. Her books and parenting advice are frequently featured in magazines such as Parents, Parenting, American Baby, and Good Housekeeping. The following books are authored or co-authored by Elizabeth and recommended by A Mother’s Boutique: The No-Cry Discipline Solution, The No-Cry Sleep Solution, The No-Cry Sleep Solution for Toddlers and Pre-schoolers, The No-Cry Potty Training Solution, Gentle Baby Care, Hidden Messages, Perfect Parenting, Kid Cooperation, and The Successful Child.

Ask Judy

As a mom and advocate of breastfeeding I’m always looking out for great tips and ready to answer questions- So let me just open things up and say

ASK ME!

Really it’s okay- no question is ’stupid’ and I welcome them. I also love to hear some great tips! So please take a moment and fill out the contact form and I will either contact you directly or will feature your question or tip here on the site so that all can benefit.

When Should I Start My Baby On Solids?

Reader Question

I could also use your advice on babies! This one is uncharted territory
for me. My daughter is now 10.5 months. She basically hasn’t eaten solids
yet. My boys both seemed “hungry” by 5.5 months and smoothly transitioned
to solids and nursing. She doesn’t like solids and solids don’t like her
(any little bit of food binds her up so much she can’t sleep and is
miserable for several days until it passes!). She seems healthy and well
fed just on breastmilk, and I noticed on your blog a few moms wrote in that
they didn’t start solids for a year. I guess I am just not sure when to
push solids now, what to start her on if I do. But I am just not sure what
to do and how to know if she needs it? Any advice?

Advice From Judy

Lots of babies don’t eat solids until 12 months or even later.
Nutritionally they don’t need it. The only reason to introduce them is for
the experience of different tastes and textures. I would say follow her
cues – if she isn’t ready, keep offering, but don’t push it. Your
breastmilk is all she needs to be healthy and strong.

Do you have a question you’d like answered? Please fill out our Contact Form!

When Your Child Needs A Nap But Won’t Take One

Daytime naps might last just a few short hours, but they can affect all twenty-four hours of a child’s day. Naps can improve a child’s mood and reduce fussiness, crying, whining, and tantrums. Studies show that children who nap daily get sick less often, grow taller, and are less likely to be obese when they grow up. Naps enhance attention span and brain development. Naps can also help make up for any shortage in nighttime sleep. Even a one hour shortage in overall sleep hours can have a negative effect on a child – compromising alertness and brain function, and increasing fussiness and fatigue.

There are many ideas for helping a child to take a nap, but the best idea in the world may not work for you if the solution doesn’t address the reason that your child won’t nap. There is not just one reason that babies and young children refuse to nap – there are hundreds of different reasons. Before you decide on a solution you need to understand your child’s motivation. Once you figure out the cause of your child’s “nonnappingness” you can put together a plan to overcome her resistance. Here are a few typical reasons kids won’t nap – and suggestions to solve each problem:

Problem: Has outgrown the current nap schedule

Solutions: Think about any changes in your child’s life, growth or development. Has he learned to crawl, begun to eat solid food or started daycare? Any change can also affect sleep patterns. Watch your child for signs of tiredness between naps and adjust your schedule to meet his new needs.

Problem: Nap schedule doesn’t match your child’s biological clock

Solutions: Naptime, bedtime, mealtime, exposure to light and darkness, and activity all can affect your child’s biological clock. Look at your child’s schedule to be sure these things occur at reasonable times every day. The improper order of things (such as active, brightly lit playtime just before bed) can affect your child’s rhythm.

Problem: Nap schedule isn’t consistent from day to day

Solutions: If on weekdays nap times, bedtime and wakeup time are specific, but on weekends they’re hit and miss, then your child will be functioning with a constant bout of jetlag. Other inconsistencies can also affect this, such as when your child naps at a certain time at daycare, but a different time at home, or if he takes a nice long nap on days when you are at home but takes a short one in the car (or skips a nap entirely) when you are on the go. Set up a possible nap schedule for your child and do your best to stay within a half hour of the nap times that you have set up.

Read more

Doulas Have Heart And Are By Your Side During Childbirth

The other day I asked my friend, Amy Farr, to share with my readers what it is that she does. Amy is a doula and if your town is anything like mine- many people you will run into don’t even know exactly what a doula is. That’s okay- it’s why I wanted her to tell us more about what a doula is and why she loves being one.

The word “doula” comes from ancient Greek and refers to “a woman experienced in childbirth who provides continuous physical, emotional and informational support to the mother before, during and after childbirth.

A doula is not there to replace the role of the partner but to enhance it. Some partners want to be there and just be in the moment. Having a doula present allows the partner to be as involved as he/she is comfortable being.

A doula believes in a woman’s body and it’s ability to birth. A doula is the one person present during labor and birth who is solely focused on the needs of the mother and partner. She anticipates the mother’s needs, helps to provide comfort and helps the mother obtain all the information that she needs to allow her to make decisions when it comes to any interventions that may come up.

Studies have shown a decrease in interventions when a doula is present. C-section rates are lower, use of anesthesia is lower, breastfeeding rates are higher, post-partum depression rates are lower and bonding is increased when a doula is present.

As a doula I feel blessed and honored to be included in each and every birth that I attend. My goal is to help women to feel empowered by their birth experience. With all of the interventions that women face nowadays too many women feel like birth was something that was done to them and not like they were an active participant in the process. Part of the doulas responsibility it to nurture and protect the mother’s memory of her experience.

If you or someone you know may be interested in finding a doula for your next birth experience check out Dona.com for information. To read more about Amy Farr and her doula mission please visit Blessed Arrivals.

Did you have a doula for you child’s birth? How did she help you in the different stages before, during, and after the blessed event?

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