Stress-free Nursing In Public

By Elisa Minsk Hartstein

Mastering breastfeeding takes patience. With time you learn proper latch-on, positioning, and how to gauge your baby’s sensitivity to external stimuli while nursing.

But once you have that down and are ready to hit the road with your baby, how do you get comfortable nursing in public? Inevitably your little one may need to nurse when you are out at the mall, in a restaurant, at a wedding, or in the park.

Stress-free nursing in public can be as simple as: scoping out a spot, dressing for it, and feeling confident about what you are doing.

Scope out a spot: Some moms and nurslings are comfortable nursing out in the middle of all the action. Other babies are distracted by outside activity while nursing, and some moms need a relaxed spot in order to let down. It is almost always possible to carve out a private space. If you are in a shopping mall, an empty dressing room is ideal for privacy and quiet. Or try one of the comfortable lounges before the entrance to ladies’ rooms in department stores. In a restaurant, positioning your chair away from the activity will create a personal space for you and your nursling. If you are at a wedding or party, find a separate room to escape to. If you cannot, moving to a quieter corner towards the back can work as well.

Dress for it: Anticipate your outing when getting dressed. Make sure that your clothing provides nursing access – for example, having to lift one’s dress up from the bottom to nurse would not be conducive to public breastfeeding! Make sure your top can lift comfortably or that your dress has buttons or another type of opening at the top. A light blanket or loose scarf can provide additional discretion. Wearing a baby sling is ideal since your nursling can breastfeed peacefully and discreetly while you are going about your day. Wearing a nursing camisole or nursing top makes breastfeeding even more discreet by keeping your body covered while you nurse.

Feel confident about what you are doing: The most important thing is to feel confident about nursing your baby. While it’s true that some people may not be used to the sight of a nursing woman, if you feel good about what you are doing, you will project that image to others. They in turn will feel more relaxed too. In short, people will take their cues from you, and when you give off the signal that you are comfortable with what you are doing, others will be too.

As an extension of the tips above, try to nurse your baby before leaving the house to give yourself more time before the next feeding. You can also nurse in the car (not while driving of course!) right before getting out. Finally, read your baby’s cues and nurse them before they get too hungry, to minimize fussiness while breastfeeding in unfamiliar places.

Enjoy nursing your little one – no matter where you are – knowing that you are giving him the best possible nutrition, and helping to create a very special bond.

Elisa Minsk Hartstein earned her MBA from Columbia University, is the mother of 4 breastfed children, and is the founder of Milk Nursingwear. Prior to founding Milk, she created the Expressiva Nursingwear brand, which she sold in 2007. Milk Nursingwear is also a proud sponsor of the Mommy News & Views Blogiversary Celebration!

Breastfeeding in Public

Welcome to the Carnival of Breastfeeding for June! This month’s topic is breastfeeding in public and you can see lots of other great posts by following the links at the end of this article.

When I heard that the topic for this month’s Carnival was going to be Breastfeeding In Public, I was thrilled. This is a topic that I have been meaning to write about for a long time – and it is something that I have a ton of experience with!!

You see, when my son was an infant – and really throughout the first year of his life and beyond, he was a “nibbler.” He didn’t eat a lot at a time, but he ate often! On average, he nursed every 1-2 hours for the first year of his life during daytime hours. So no matter where we went, we ended up breastfeeding in public. I became the queen of finding great places to breastfeed my baby and I developed a list of tips and tricks along the way. I’d like to share those places and tips with you now.

Places that are particularly breastfeeding friendly:

Babies ‘R’ Us: I think we went to Babies ‘R’ Us at least twice a week when my son was an infant. Each store has a wonderful mother’s room equipped with a changing table, a comfy sofa, a rocker and pretty pictures on the wall. Whenever you walk in, there is usually another mom in there breastfeeding her baby. It is a lovely room and I spent many hours in it during my sons early days!! Many of the store locations also have free infant sized diapers for you to use when you are using the changing table too.

Motherhood Maternity: Each Motherhood store has a sign in their dressing room that says “Breastfeeding welcome here” and they freely open up their dressing room to you to come in, sit down and nurse your baby. Even if I wasn’t buying anything (their nursing supplies collection is pretty limited), I was still able to go in and use their dressing room. And at least at the one near me, the sales associates were always very friendly.

Tips for breastfeeding in public:

Many moms are nervous about having to feed their babies in public. The first thing you should know is that you are doing what is BEST for your baby and what is NATURAL! You shouldn’t ever feel intimidated about breastfeeding in public. In fact, you should be PROUD! Below are some tips to help you feel more confident.

1) Know your rights. In most states, breastfeeding mothers are protected by law. Read up on the laws in your state and be knowledgeable about where and when the law is on your side.
2) Practice. Many moms are nervous about breastfeeding in public because they are afraid that they will bare too much skin while getting the baby latched on. The best way to get good at getting your baby latched on is to practice. Practice at home where you don’t have to be nervous while you are doing it. Another good thing to do is to practice in front of a mirror. That way you can see yourself and see how little of your breast can actually be seen. You will be surprised at how discreet you already are – without even knowing it!
3) Get some nursing clothes. Many women feel more comfortable breastfeeding in public if they have clothing with easily accessible nursing access. This is what I did. For me personally, I didn’t care if someone happened to get a glimpse of my breast, but I didn’t want them to see my belly!! So I invested in nursing tops and wore them everywhere! I even wore them at work when I was pumping. Now-a-days, nursing tops are so cute and stylish that your non-nursing friends will be asking you where they can get a top as cute as the one you are wearing! So treat yourself – you deserve it!
4) Use a sling. Using a sling makes it easier to nurse your baby while walking around or even sitting somewhere comfortable. It helps to keep your baby close to you and makes nursing a little more discreet by giving you some extra fabric to cover up. I can remember walking around shopping when my sister-in-laws were in town one time. I had my sling and my baby was nursing while I walked around! It was great. The only down-side was I wasn’t wearing a nursing top, so I had to cover up my belly with a receiving blanket! I highly recommend combining use of your sling with a great nursing top – that way you can walk around, have one arm free and still nurse your baby anywhere!
5) Be confident. You are doing the best thing for your baby!! Don’t let anyone make you feel bad for it. I can remember being in a restaurant one time with a friend. My baby needed to nurse and we were sharing a table with another couple. I thought about asking them if they “minded” if I nursed my baby. But then I thought to myself “What if they say that they do mind? I’m not going to change what I am going to do – my baby needs to eat, so I am going to feed him” So I didn’t ask. They didn’t say anything either!

I nursed my son in public just about anywhere you can imagine (at the grocery store, at the mall, sitting on a park bench, at the library, when visiting friends at work, at my work, at my husband’s work, at Disney World, at the museum, on the side of the road in my car and just about any other place you can imagine). We nursed in public until he was about 18-20 months old and we NEVER had anyone make a negative comment towards us. I was always ready in case they did – but no one ever did. Sometimes people would smile at us and sometimes they would walk away, but I always felt good because I was giving my baby exactly what he needed! I even convinced my nanny to nurse her own children with out even trying! Just by her seeing how “easy” it was when we were together and I could just nurse my baby when he was hungry and how “difficult” it was when she was by her self and had to plan ahead and lug bottles everywhere.

Bottom line, there is no need to cover yourself when nursing in public – you have a right to feed your baby. Different women feel more or less comfortable when doing this in public – so use the tools that make you feel better. Get out and enjoy this time with your baby! And most of all FEEL PROUD of what you are doing.

Do you have funny or interesting stories about nursing in public? Do you have any great tips you’d like to share with other new moms? Please leave a comment.

And don’t forget to visit the other Carnival of Breastfeeding Posts at the great blogs listed below (NOTE: this list will be updated throughout the next few days, so please check back often!):

• Lucy & Ethel Have a Baby Blog: (Boobs) Out And Proud
• Dirty Diaper Laundry Blog: Breastfeeding in Public- Talents- I haz it
• PhD In Parenting Blog: Would You Could You Breastfeed In Public
• Kim Through The Looking Glass Blog: Here? At The Restaurant?
• GrudgeMom Blog: Nursing in a room full of people you know
• MumUnplugged Blog: Aww, is he sleeping?
• Massachusetts Friends of Midwives Blog: Nursing in Public: Chinatown, the Subway, the Vatican, and More
• Mother Mary’s Soapbox: June Carnival: Breastfeeding in Public
• Tiny Grass Blog: Nursing in Public as an Immigrant
• Blisstree Blog: Nursing in Public: To Cover or Not to Cover
• Stork Stories Blog: Little Old Men… & Nursing in Public
• Chronicles Of A Nursing Mom Blog: Why Worry About NIP?
• Warm Hearts Happy Family Blog: Breastfeeding and the summertime
• Blacktating Blog: Thank You For Nursing In Public
• Musings on mamahood Blog: NIP, no tuck
• The Motherwear Breastfeeding Blog: Get kicked off a bus for nursing in public? Here’s how to respond
• Mama Knows Breast Blog: Products That Can Help You Breastfeed In Public
• babyREADY blog: A wee NIP in the park!
• Tales of life with a girl on the go Blog: Planes, Trains and Automobiles, we’ve breastfed in them all
• Breastfeeding Moms Unite Blog: Nursing in Public: A Fresh Perspective on Nurse-In’s
• Never a Dull Moment…Blog: Breastfeeding Hats? YES! Nursing Covers? Uh… Not So Much
• Breastfeeding Mums Blog: Nursing in Public – What’s a Breastfeeding Mother to Do!!
• Hobo Mama Blog: Easy, discreet way to breastfeed a toddler in public

Nursing In Public Has Never Been So Easy!

Do You Know Your Rights?

Picture this:

You are at the mall with your family and your baby is hungry. So you find the closest bench to sit down and feed her. Your husband and older child keep walking around. While you are sitting there an older woman walks by and smiles, a group of teenagers take a second glance, and the next passerby, a young security officer, comes up to you and says “Ma’am, you are going to have to go to the family restroom on the other side of the mall, it’s next to the food court”.

Shocked you look at him and you… [fill in the end of this story in the comments section.]

Many states across The United States have put into place legislation that protect the nursing mother’s right to nurse anywhere and anytime she wants. If you as a person are allowed to be in the area then you are allowed to nurse. Sounds simple right?

Many mothers have found that if you use a nursing cover, most people do not even take a second glance. Well, perhaps they are taking a second look because they like your nursing cover. For the most part however, people just carry on as if you are not there. Other moms are comfortable in their own skin and nursing their little one in public with no cover- just their normal clothing. This is when you will have second and third glances from passerbys. This is also when you will most likely be asked to leave the area- or cover up.

It’s important to know your rights not only to know what to do in a situation like the above, but it’s empowering and gives you strength knowing that it’s not just you! So go out- nurse in public!

Check out La Leche League International for current legislation in your area- The United States or Internationally

Nursing Top Styles: Pull Down With Under Layer

The pull down nursing top is probably one of my personal favorite types of nursing opening styles. You may even be doing the ‘pull down’ with a loose fitting top that you already have. So what is so great about a pull down nursing top? It’s simple you just pull down the side you need to nurse from. The wonderful part about a under layer is that there is a extra piece of fabric left after you have exposed the opening that will cover the top of your breast. This allows for more comfort and discretion for those hesitant about nursing in public.

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Tags: discreet nursing wear, nursing in public, nursing top opening style